Planning a wedding is a very exciting, personal event. You want it to be perfect and you want it to unfold the way that you imagine it so that you can share your vision with everyone you invite.

But there is one thing that could be holding you back during your wedding planning, and it’s a mistake that so many people find so difficult to avoid. Simply put, it’s Not Letting Go, and I’m going to give you the one strategy you need that will help you make great wedding plans.

Let’s say that you’ve decided everything about your wedding already. You’ve made a master list for the theme, the color scheme, the type of centerpieces you want, and the flowers you will use, just to name a few of the many things you’ll have to choose. Somewhere in that list, you’ll find a bump in the road. As event planning unfolds, there might be one element that just doesn’t work, but you want it so badly even though it slows down some of your progress.

Sometimes it’s something as small as the shoes your bridesmaids will wear. This happened to one bride who was so set on making sure her bridesmaids wore the same shoes in a tone that would complement their dresses. They found the shoes, but they did not fit everyone comfortably. Eventually, one bridesmaid lost the strap to one of her shoes and had to change into a completely different pair. Luckily, this did not happen during the ceremony, but somewhere during the move from that to the reception, the strap to her left shoe just disappeared.

That’s sort of a minor example, but in retrospect, a back up plan would have come in handy.

When making your list of must-haves, also add two alternatives that you would be okay with having. For example, if your #1 centerpiece choice includes white candles and floral arrangements, make your #2 choice something similar that would still hold the theme together even if your first choice of flowers were to be unavailable or in shortage for any reason.

In short, the strategy is to make a list of your #1 choices for everything you want in your wedding. That way, if one of them is not available, you can still choose from other items you really love. This helps smooth out any bumps in the road so you can have a much more pleasant and positive wedding planning experience.